Click the video above for 2 minutes of background waves while reading.
I like walking on the beach. It’s good for the mind, body, and soul – and refreshing on my feet.
On this day, I kept thinking about my Friends walk. This time I wonder about the people who have meant the most to me and the qualities they possess – the qualities separating them from the masses. What if we could wrap all those qualities into one?
I’m thinking about the top level of the Friends pyramid – the ones that are more than casual or even close friends. One hierarchy called them the intimate friend. To others, the very best friend, the truest friend, the most trusted friend, an A-1 friend. Let’s wrap all these qualities into an Ultimate Friend.
An Ultimate Friend is accessible and approachable – there for us in our time of need.
An Ultimate Friend is trustworthy and loyal; they freely speak because they care.
An Ultimate Friend accepts, empowers, and validates us to raise us above the fray.
An Ultimate Friend creates cherished memories.
An Ultimate Friend delivers that special hug at the appropriate time.
An Ultimate Friend friend is confidential – so one doesn’t worry about them ever using, “Don’t tell that I told you” before spilling the beans on a secret important to you.
An Ultimate Friend genuinely cares. They worry about you when you are hurt. They are happy for you when good things happen.
An Ultimate Friend wonders why they didn’t know each other many years ago.
An Ultimate Friend shows up at a funeral of a member of your family.
An Ultimate Friend is secure and assured, smart and kind, positive and respectful – plus a conversationalist and a listener.
An Ultimate Friend unexpectedly contacts you – checking in with a text, email, or phone call – to see how you are doing – even just to say Hi – and always delivers a smile.
An Ultimate Friend surprises you with something unexpected – something that you will cherish forever.
An Ultimate Friend has a way of touching your soul – and they do so because the two souls are connected – and even bound together as one.
An Ultimate Friend knows how to care – when to remain silent – knows how to listen – when to stand by in support – when to talk – and when to tell us what we don’t want to hear. Their language is always free and honest.
An Ultimate Friend knows us and loves us just the same.
An Ultimate Friend is someone that raises us in many ways – they bring out the best in us.
An Ultimate Friend allows us to be ourselves by accepting our faults and fears while being non-judgemental.
When an Ultimate Friend asks, “How are you doing?” they may not mean “What are you doing?” because they are aware of the burdens you carry.
With an Ultimate Friend, one experiences a wide range of emotions and thoughts – intellectual, personal, soul searching, and deep in multiple ways.
The Ultimate Friend provides a source of pleasure by their mere presence – a presence that can also be felt from afar.
Ultimate Friends recognize the specialness of their relationship – and know that others may not understand.
Maybe this person is only found in the Shangri-la – but maybe not. Not everyone has an Ultimate Friend – but those that do, consider themselves lucky because they know they possess a treasure – a gift, a blessing, a source of inspiration and gratitude.
In short, Ultimate Friends click together two parts into one.
For now, my treasure is not only in my head it is also on the beach because I like walking on the beach. Besides, it is good for the mind, body, and soul – and refreshing on my feet.
See what other bloggers have written about best friends
- Friends Forever (essay)
- Best Friends Forever (poem)
- Best Friends (essay)
- Dear Best Friend (poem)
- Friendship and Freedom (essay)
- The House that Shelia Built (essay)
Next Post: Autumn – Wednesday 3rd November @ 1:00 AM (Eastern US)
Beach Walk Reflections: Thoughts from thinking while walking 
Beautiful. Like a true friend.
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Cindy,
I’ve tried to capture the ultimate friend, so thanks for the endorsement that I did. 🙂
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This is a very poignant post.
After my hubby, I would say that my sister is also my ultimate friend.
These kinds of friends carry you through the thick and thin of life, don’t they?
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Ingrid,
I think you have brought up a point that I didn’t mention. That is, the ultimate friend could be a spouse or a sibling. I can recall thinking about that but for some reason, the thought got bypassed when writing. No matter, yes, Ultimate Friends carry us through thick and thin. Thanks for sharing!
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Frank, you’ve made me cry again, and it’s only breakfast time. I have several such treasured friends and I hope that I can be an equally good friend to them. I shall spend some of today sending them little ‘hello, how are you?’ messages. Hope all is well with you?
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Jo,
My day has just started and yet to have breakfast, but your comment has touched me. If this walk causes you to reach out to your treasured friends, for me, that is high praise indeed. Thank you for starting my day the way you did.
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Ah, yes…. ultimate indeed! 🙏
Yamas, Frank! 🍷
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Marina,
As I was drafting this walk, “best” didn’t seem good enough for best of the best friend … so that is where “ultimate” came to the rescue. Yamas!
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A great post. I think everyone is lucky to find even ONE “Ultimate Friend” in their lives yet some are “extra lucky” and have several. I have had a few and they are or were the jewels in my jewelry box of life. Treasures of the heart.
Hugs, Pam
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Pam,
Perfect because that is my point. If we truly have someone with most of these qualities, we are very lucky – and more than one? Extra lucky. Cheers to your treasures. 🙂
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Another thoughtful walk, Frank. Hi! 😀
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Merril,
Thinking is what I like to do when I walk. Hope all is well and enjoy your weekend! 🙂
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These people are treasures in our lives, Frank. Sadly, some have passed.
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Dan,
No doubt about it. Losing these treasured friends is hard because the odds of replacing them is slim. Other friends are much easier to find.
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And all the while I was reading this I was thinking, And what of those who (for whatever reason) have no friends? I bear such sorrow for those people, for during several periods of my life, I have been one of their number. Never, ever, take for granted your ability to have a friend… of any kind
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Crispina,
I have also thought about your point … and it is truly sad indeed. I also think about low times in life when I wanted someone to step up and care, and it didn’t happen. Then again, some times the one who does is not the one we expect. Many thanks for sharing a very important thought.
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Frank, what a beautiful meditation on what is involved in the ultimate friendship. As I was reading this, my husband, my sister and my daughter kept coming to mind…
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Barbara,
The ultimate friendship involves an extraordinary number of qualities. I’m sure, there are people who have the qualities of the ultimate friend dispersed across a few very close friends. Glad you enjoyed this and thanks for sharing.
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I had a conversation w a long-time friend the other day. She said old friends are special because you can’t make them. You either have them or you don’t. I thought that was an excellent thought and agree wholeheartedly! While new friends can possess all of the traits you mention Frank, only an old friend can know what’s in your heart or on your mind without asking😊. Lovely thought for this morning, thank you!
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Tina,
That;s a great line by your long-time friend. Similarly, I think the songs says you can have old friends, but we will never have new old friends. Cheers to the specialness of our long-time friends. Thanks for sharing!
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Beautiful friendship post! I hope you have great friends. I only have one friend that I can say it’s an ultimate friend, and she is more than enough!
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Elizabeth,
Thanks for the kind words. I’m personable and I’ve always had friends. Like everyone, some better than others, and friends in a variety of situations. That ultimate friend is a different matter because that status is truly for the special. Cheers to yours!
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Such a dear thoughtful post, Frank. I think my Ultimate Friend is the Holy. What we might call God, Spirit, Universe, Love. Always there. So many of the qualities you listed are shining there in the Holy, never further than a breath away.
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Kathy,
The spiritual aspect is one that I consider to include, but decided (early on) to not do so – therefore I appreciate that you brought it up! 🙂 Thanks for sharing.
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Wonderful, Frank. You have written about the most important people in our lives.
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Jennie,
Thank you. Friends are unquestionably important and the Ultimate Friend is one of the people leading us in life.
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I think I’m still waiting to meet my Ultimate Friend, Frank. Or maybe I already have and just don’t know it yet. Your post is full of pointers! 🙂
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Tom,
For a variety of reasons, I can understand not having an ultimate friend. Bottom line is that there are so many variables. Although my post is aiming at the people in our lives, your comment got me thinking the reverse – that is, what can each of us do to improve friendships.
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Ultimate friends are the cherries on top of life. Have a super spooktacular Howl-oween weekend.
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Monika,
Thanks you for sharing. I like that … with a variation – Ultimate friends are the cherries on top of the sundae of life. Happy Halloween to you.
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My ultimate friend is my hubby, makes life easy!
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Fraggle,
Cheers to the support that hubby gives you in life!
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If I may add, personally . . my ultimate friend doesn’t judge me for rooting for the Miami Dolphins, or putting ketchup on my mac and cheese (sometimes) or dipping my pizza crust in soda (sometimes) . . .
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Marc,
Absolutely – the Ultimate Friend is not judgmental. Meanwhile, all of us have our quirks, but I’ve never known or heard of anyone dipping pizza crust in soda. Ever into other beverages?
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I am married to my best friend, and female friends that have stayed with me for years are utterly important. There are true friends can be counted in one hand, and “how are you” friends, all have a certain importance in ones lives. Great topic. Nice to see you in the feed again.
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Ritva,
An important topic indeed. A tip of the cap to your marriage also providing a best friend …. and chhers to the ladies that been true to you for many years! 🙂
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Beautiful post, Frank! My hubby is my ultimate friend. I’ve found through the years there are very few true friends. However, with that said, acquaintances touch our lives for a reason.
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Eugi,
There is no doubt that friend of all levels touch our lives in some way. After all, we humans are social creatures.Interestingly, a number of recent comments are like yours – so cheers to your hubby! Thanks for sharing.
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An ultimate friend will let you cry on her brand new silk blouse and never say a word. An ultimate friend will hate the man who made you cry. My best friend is an unrelated family member.
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Pam,
The ultimate friend has so many qualities – maybe too much for any one person to handle – but I like your examples. Thanks for sharing.
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Frank,
I think I have 3 Ultimate friends.
Pretty good, I’d say!
Happy Hallowe’en!
🎃🍷🎃
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Resa,
Oh wow … that is great! Then again, Canadians are known for being friendly. 😉 Happy Halloween.
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Cherish those friends.
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John,
No doubt …. especially because they are few in number.
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A lovely tribute to friendship Frank. Something we all can use these days.
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Holly,
Thank you. Friends are important, but the ultimate friend is at another level … and yes – during these trying times, friends are important. Well, that is we keep them.
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I’ve been fortunate to have several friends like this, even if I’ve lost contact with one of them. Beautifully written.
janet
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Janet,
If you have several ultimate friends, wow …. you are lucky! The fact that you’ve lost contact with them is a bummer – but hey – that happens in life. Glad you enjoyed this and thanks for sharing.
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This is a very wonderful idea Frank..friends are friends.
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Anita,
Thanks for the kind words. Friends are necessary, important, and more. Unfortunately to many, they may come and go depending on the circumstances.
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If we have even one Ultimate Friend, we are truly blessed! For some reason I haven’t been seeing your posts Frank! …fantastic words here, and a great song video. I’ve seen this done with other songs, it’s amazing how they do that!! Hope you are doing well 😊
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Lisa,
Thanks for the kind words – and I’m with you – having one person like this is very fortunate … and many people don’t! I returned from blog break last week (first since June). I invite you to go back one post because it goes well with this one. Glad you enjoyed the video … special indeed. Ohe thing for share, the virus increased videos like this one! All well here, and hoping the same for you.
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Very touching post, Frank. I’ve had some friends like this in my past, but lately it’s been a harder thing to come by. There seems to be this dichotomy as we age – in some ways more outwardly focused and in other ways very self-focused, wanting to make the later years last, experience as much as possible.
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Eilene,
As Lisa mentioned in the comment before you, we are fortunate just to have one person like this in our life – let alone multiple (which to me is rare). Like you, I also think each of us look at friendships differently as we age. Then again, that’s part of life … but perspective changes with age. Thanks for sharing.
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I’ve had and lost friends like this over the years. It it not a term given lightly. In today’s world, I believe the definition of what constitutes ultimate friend changes over time.
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Dale,
Yes – not only is friends an overused term, so are close friends. Friendships unquestionably change over time. Not in terms of societal time – but in terms of individual time. Friends are different at age 6 vs 16 … let along 30 v 65. Thanks for sharing.
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Much food for thought here, Frank … as well as much to celebrate and cherish over the special friends we all have. Thank you!
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Debbie,
With this post I wanted to celebrate those at the top of the friendship pyramid because of the important role they play. To me, having one person like the above is a true treasure and a stroke of luck. Thanks for sharing your thoughts.
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I love scrolling on what looks like a new look on your sight, your visuals and hearing your reflections you delivery so well with jewels to ponder. I can see you walking the beach. It’s as though we are having a conversation together and I’m nodding saying “yeah that’s it, I so agree”. Or just walking in silence. It’s great to see you back writing. You have captured the ultimate gifts of friendship here. No matter how close how far or how long it’s been or young or old the friendship, there are those that feel they have been there forever and then there are the old shoes that really have. Beautiful sharing of your heart in words and pictures Dear Frank,. 💖
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Cindy,
Glad you enjoyed this post and thanks for the kind words. So much to be said about friends. I guess that’s a reason why I dedicated two walks to the topic (the previous one, too). It’s interesting how friendships change as our individual lives change … including aging. In terms of the look here … hmmmm … guess you haven’t noticed it before. Then again, this is only my second post since June – so it’s been awhile. When I started this blog, when I saw this style, I knew it was the one because I knew I had the perfect background image for it. Yep – I wanted the visual feel for a beach walk. Thanks for noticing! 🙂
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I really like how you define the ultimate friend and the pictures you chose went so well.
Sadly – in my experience sometimes the ultimate friend had a life span – or it was for just a certain amount of time and then we moved on or changed – although a special friend locally has been in my circle since 2003 – but not quite at the ultimate level – and have a handful of others who are close – but only have two or maybe a third in the ultimate pyramid too – and the hubs is one of them ☀️
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Yvette,
Thanks for sharing your thoughts. I’m with you … that is, ultimate friends are rare – and sometimes they don’t last because of life circumstances – yet other friendship levels are also important. Cheers to hubby being one of them. 🙂 Glad you enjoyed the images – all courtesy of pexels.com (which is a good resource).
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Friends and true ones are a gift of this lifetime indeed. The nature of friendships and what is needed of them changes along with our personal growth. Enjoyed reading through this beach walk ponderings on friends and friendships – so very relevant.
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PD,
Good to see you and thanks for sharing a bit of your thoughts. We humans are social creatures – so friendships are an important aspect of life. On the other hand, it’s interesting how friendships are different for each of us. Ues – friendships are both important and complex. Hope all is well with you in California.
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Beautiful sentiments, Frank! Ultimate friends are still around even when you move 900 miles away.
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Terri,
Happy Sunday to you. Interesting how some friendship easily survive 900 miles while crumble … some friendships also fall part with those who only live a few blocks away. If true for you, cheers to a keeping a strong connection with a special friends that is so far away. Thanks for sharing.
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Such a beautiful and thoughtful post, Frank. I am blessed with a few ultimate friends. I count my hubby, my daughter and my sister among these. One of my most cherished friends has sadly passed on but she still lives in my heart.
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Sylvia,
Oh yes – even when the most cherished friends pass, their special place in the heart remains. Then, when they pop into our mind, the heart glows. Cheers to your hubby, sister, and daughter! Thnks for sharing.
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Wonderful thoughts on ultimate friends. Although I’ve had and have many friends, I’ve only had a few that could be called ultimate friends. They only come along every so often, and what jewels they are! Like the video of “You’ve Got a Friend.” Snappy!
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Laura,
I’m with you – friends are many plus they come and go with life – but ultimate friends are few – possibly few enough that they never appear in some people’s life. Thanks for watching the video and glad you enjoyed it. Then again, I know we have similar wide-ranging tastes in music. Cheers to that!!!
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I think you’ve created a lovely post about friends that stand out and shine in our lives. Hopefully we have many friends who enrich our lives, but by the meaning of the word “ultimate” it would seem we may only have one, or one at a time. I have someone in mind, and she is indeed a treasure.
Very cool video, too!
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Debra,
Thanks for the kind words. For most people, friends are many and the come and go over time. With this post I focused on the best of the best and the qualities they hold. So yes, they are truest of the true, therefore (and unfortunately) few in number. Glad you enjoyed the video – yes – well done!
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(Again, just saw this!) You chose perfectly and this completed your ‘friend’ theme beautifully!
Yamas and cheers to our ‘ultimates’!
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Marina,
Thank you, thank you. Friends are one thing, the Ultimate Friend is at a much higher level. Yamas!
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Yamas!!
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