142 – Hold

After uncharacteristically taking so long to reply to comments on the last post – let alone visit other blogs – I realize I’m in a time-poor period. I am transitioning to posting only once a week hoping the status won’t last too long. Time will tell if my publishing dates vary. Thanks for understanding.

Click the video above for 2 minutes of background waves while reading.

I like to walk on the beach. It is good for the mind, body, and soul – and refreshing on my feet.

Today offers a cloudy sky, a mild temperature, and a wind with a touch of briskness. However, I’m unsure of my topic to ponder.

As I pass a large patch of shells, one catches my eyes. I grab it, hold it, and stare at the intricacies. In the palm of my hand is one of nature’s beauties that others may find to be a mundane shell.

I continue walking – but wondering why I am holding this shell. I certainly have more beautiful ones at home, so I return the shell to the sand – but not without a smile because I now have my topic to ponder.

How many things do we hold in a day? A glass, bottle, cup, utensils, and keys – objects we carry from place to place – and even a pen to scribe these words. I’m obligated to mention a phone, but I know there are many more because we grip, grab, grasp, carry, and pull many things in a day.

Photo by Cup of Couple on Pexels.com

As social creatures with a wide range of emotions, we humans hold onto people, places, and things for many reasons: the memories of vacations – memorabilia and special things – long talks and soft, tender moments – memories, ideas, and hope – good times and bad – happiness and sadness – personal desires and dreams – times of personal pride and hurt.

Some hold on to past emotions hoping those emotions will rekindle, even though exhilaration probably will continue to wane. However, time will deliver fond memories that bring smiles and warm hearts.

We hold onto mementos for reasons we can define and find value – reasons that are personal and with minimal monetary value (if any at all). Things that most likely relatives will toss after our time passes. I sincerely doubt anyone will want the TWA pin I received on my first airplane flight at age 11.

I wonder how many ticket stubs, letters, photos, baby things, and other personal pieces I have stuffed in a drawer or a box. Those things I hold on to because of memories, pride, and accomplishments for my hall of fame – items telling part of my story of who I am.

Is there anyone who doesn’t hold onto past badges of honor, worries, relationships, social media, phones, old books, clutter, t-shirts, letters, cards, and more because these items tell a personal story? My story – your story – and we don’t want to be forgotten.

We hold onto grudges that lay on us like heavy objects. But, I am sure each of us can justify the grudge’s existence. Some may be necessary, while others are not. The ones involving disrespect are a personal challenge. Unfortunately, some people hold grudges against others based on religion or politics – let alone differences crossing the line into gender, sexuality, race, nationality, or wealth.

We hold on to dreams with hopes of reaching them. That journey is a difficult task and requires focus, preparation, and a bit of luck. However, there is also a time when we can let go of that dream .

Photo by James Wheeler on Pexels.com

We hold onto the desires that offer a better tomorrow. We want it so bad that we can taste it – yet it seems so far away – but we hold on – hoping. Then again, holding on to the unattainable is not rational – but letting go is difficult.

I wonder who holds on to something because it fills a void: such as a missing love – a missing friend – a missing family member. On a lighter note, a ballroom dancer holds on to their partner as a point of nonverbal communication so the two can act as one.

Not only do we hold onto love, but love also has a hold on us. Love is something that once we have it, we tend to hold on to it and keep close. Yet, if love is slipping away, one is caught in the conundrum of holding on as long as possible or letting it slip away.

I know immigrants assimilating into a new land hold onto the customs and traditions of their homeland because that is who they are. It’s not about ignoring their new land because they are holding on to something comfortable that is part of them – who they are. However, the next generation may find holding on to be challenging.

I think about people who hold onto the past and resist change over time – refusing to accept the new while holding on to the days and the ways that will never return.

Photo by Dominika Roseclay on Pexels.com

Musicians know the sign of when they must hold, but to many athletes, holding is usually not a good thing. Some people say they hold the keys to success, but would you believe them?

As this walk ends, thinking about hold has been a positive aspect of my day. We certainly use “hold” in many ways, and I’m sure I’ve only touched the surface. I am confident my mind will be lighter the next time I return to this beautiful sand. After all, I’m a positive person. Nonetheless, I like walking on the beach because it is good for the mind, body, and soul – and refreshing on my feet.

See what other bloggers have posted about Hold

Next Post: Fingers – ??? @ 1 AM (Eastern US)


107 thoughts on “142 – Hold”

    1. Jo,
      Your words are very poignant. Yes – we hang onto blogs because they are part of us – which includes the interactions we have with others. If we let go, we lose more than an outlet for our writing … therefore, we hang on. Thanks for the encouragement.

      Liked by 1 person

  1. Well as always Frank and interesting and informative post. Last year we had a fire in our home that destroyed several rooms including my office. I cannot begin to tell you how much of my beloved memorabilia was lost. I also cannot begin to tell you how very little of what I thought was so important I’ve missed! Since then I’ve told everyone I know to de-clutter while you can and “hold” on to only the very most important things! My new office is far less chock-full of things I apparently didn’t need to keep and therefore the things that ARE in there are much more visible and important to me. A difficult but valuable lesson learned!

    Liked by 4 people

    1. Tina,
      I can’t imagine what you went through – but here you are with a wonderful lesson learned! I know we’ve learned a lot going being involved in going through the homes of my wife’s father and aunt. A brother and sister – one a minimalist with old stuff – the other a full of disorganized clutter. That has caused us to periodically go through our stuff! Thank you for sharing!!!!

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Frank, I recently heard of something (twice actually!) and I am paraphrasing here…a person is never fully gone from this world until the last person has forgotten about them. That’s what I thought of reading this. The holding on one does after they have lost someone dear to them. The hold the departed can have among the living, etc. I’m thinking about that concept a lot lately, and definitely like the idea someone still is part of this world even after physically ceasing to be.

    Liked by 4 people

    1. Bruce,
      Make that 3 things because I know I’ve written a similar sentiment in one of the essays here. I remember a monument in my small hometown that had the names of local military who died in the Civil War. A list of many last names that I never knew in my area. I think the same when I visit a cemetery while realizing that about myself. It’s a humbling thought – but also very real. Thanks for sharing!

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Hold on, I’m coming! No worries, I know you are not holding out!
    I think once a week to post is perfect.

    My sister had this thing about having her foot held. She would sound very pleading when she would ask anyone to hold her foot. So you’d be standing there like a moron, holding her foot. Then she’d watch tv or whatever, but never say thank you, or you can put it down now. She conned me in many times, and others. I’ve held on to that memory, for some idiotic reason.

    On another thing:
    Do you pay for no Ads? I’m starting to see this big box with 9 ads in it on many blogs. I see it here. At least 1 person has told me they pay for no ads, and it is appearing on their blog.
    Please let me know if you see it n my blogs. I do pay for no Ads!

    Liked by 2 people

  4. I’m not used to seeing a post from you pop up in the afternoon! A wonderful idea for a post, Frank. There are certainly many things we hold onto, and also things that have a hold on us.
    Post and/or respond when you can. It does take a lot of time, and everyone understands that.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Merril,
      Yep … An entire day got away from me. I have no idea why I didn’t schedule the post Tuesday morning (I had time) for my traditional 1 AM posting. Sometime Wednesday afternoon I realized I missed it … hence the odd timing. Hopefully, I get back to my regular time. Both of us have been blogging a long time, so we know time commitment. Thanks for the encouragement!

      Liked by 1 person

  5. A wonderful music/video Frank …and we all ‘hold on’ to to a certain degree, and we all let go in time … here’s a poem I wrote as a tribute to Leonard Cohen on the day he died … my piece was an attempt to emulate his style of writing ..

    Hold Me

    Take me to my home
    Home is where my heart is
    Home is on that windy hill
    Above a secret valley
    Laying under a heavenly cloud
    Take me to my home
    I am waiting here alone
    All packed ready to go
    Vacating this old place
    Leaving this world behind
    Take me to my home
    The beyond will be greener
    I know you will be there
    You have been waiting for so long
    I know you will hold me again
    Hold me in our home

    Liked by 2 people

  6. Ah Frank! As humans we crave connection – physical, emotional, spiritual. We form the connections by holding from the moment we are born to the moment we die. We hold hands, hold ideas, beliefs, and eventually we hold onto self awareness! I think that dementia and Alzheimer’s break the connections and the individual can’t hold onto all the things that anchor them… eventually they drift away like a boat no longer held to the dock….

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Muri,
      What a wonderful comment! … so good I wish I would have come up with your words! I agree – humans crave connection and holding is very much part of that aspect. Your explanation of Alzheimer’s and dementia is perfect. Thank you for sharing!


    1. Shrubaboti,
      You describing this piece as “introspective” makes me smile because that is one of my hopes for each walk. The bottom line is that I want walks to stimulate thinking. Thank you so much for writing your piece. If you didn’t, I wouldn’t have found it! I initially thought that this topic would provide a wide range of other posts to link – but that wasn’t the case! So extra thanks to you.

      Liked by 1 person

  7. what a thought provoking post Frank with lots of honest questions posed. really great! I love it!
    We all have the same questions
    “I am confident my mind will be lighter the next time I return to this beautiful sand. After all, I’m a positive person….YES YOU ARE!! 💖💖

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Cindy,
      “Hold” has a way of getting to every one of us. Maybe not at the same time or in the same way – but it gets us! My mind must have been heavy that day – but heck – who doesn’t have those days! Glad you enjoyed, thanks for walking along, and I appreciate your kind words.


  8. Ah, yes, I too have tons of so called memorabilia…connecting and holding me to my heritage, my loved ones and my memories. I am no different than anyone else in that regard. I do think Hubby is even more of a ‘holder’ than I am, LOL!
    I believe humans are somehow programmed to be this way, it for sure helps to ground us, and gives us meaning and purpose to what and why and how we live our lives.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Ingrid,
      I think Murisopsis stated it best above – Humans craving connection – and many of our various holds are linked to our desire for connection. You mentioned heritage – that’s a great one. Holding on was important to immigrants – then that carries over to the next generation in different ways. …. and like you stated – it gives us meaning and purpose to our lives. Thanks for sharing!


  9. Holding – maybe a sense of security in times of insecurity…..holding on or holding off – it’s a reluctance to move sometimes when we hold. I hold on to my memories because I know they are fading and they are part of me. A wonderful post Frank…..and I hope you know if you post once a week or once a month we’ll all still be here to read your thoughts. Hold that thought!


    Liked by 2 people

  10. Don’t “hold” on to the notion that you have to post more than once a week. We bloggers must do what works best for our schedule, our stress level, and our creativity. I posted once a week for years – 7? 8? Recently I’ve pared down to posting once every two weeks. Personal ‘stuff’ has given me less time on the computer, but I still appreciate every blog post I read, every view that opens and enlightens my thoughts and ideas. And your blog is always one of those. You do a spectacular job describing all the ways we hold. “To have and to hold’ til death do us part” (I wrote this out of memory, hope it’s right.) Today my guy and I are celebrating our wedding anniversary. We’re holding on to so many memories but trying to release them to the NOW. which is busy with grandkids, medical appointments, and long walks. Life is different at this stage of a long-relationship, and if we hold the love, even as it changes with age, we are good til the last drop. 🙂 ❤

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Pam,
      You can see how late I am on responses (very uncharacteristic of me) … a belated Happy Anniversary to you!!!! … and I hope you had a wonderful day to celebrate. Isn’t it interesting how life changes as we age … so hats off to the two of you. How many years?

      Good advice about blogging. I refuse to get sucked into the abyss that blogging can be – but I prefer to keep my readers informed. Thanks for sharing!!!!


  11. Frank, I expect many of us hold onto things in the hopes they will help us (and possibly others) remember what was important in our lives. But, having lost a lot of my “treasures” over the years, I can attest to the fact that “things” and “stuff” might not last … but I hope the memories do. Thanks for letting me walk your beach today (and don’t fret — most of us totally get the time-crunch problem!)

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Debbie,
      Thanks for sharing some of your thoughts about hold. The loss of memories is frightening! I think of Alzheimer’s patients – I’m still amazed how many can recall detailed memories from long ago – but lose the short term memories. At least they have those treasures!

      Liked by 1 person

  12. Frank, you should never feel beholden to wrote more or read more than you can. We are all feeling the time pinch.
    As for this post, I have to say it’s one of my favourites. As I look at my over-stuffed shelves of things and stuff (thinking of George Carlin now) that I am holding on to and for what? My kids will only chuck ’em all out (mostly) when I’m gone anyway. I wonder, even, if they will ever look at the multitudes of photos I have or will they do like I have done and lug my mother’s and my father’s as well as mine, from house to house.
    My biggest fear is fire and losing it all (stuff, not people!) and then I get this strange feeling of liberty. Hmmm… maybe that nightmare is really a message!
    I’d rather hold on to memories, and loved ones with maybe a few special items while I’m here.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Dale,
      Most of us hold on to stuff – and I know we occasionally do a purge … but still a long way to go. I think about how it was like to go through my parent’s stuff after my dad died … and my sister just can’t toss any of it! I invite you to read Tina’s comment (see was early). It’s very poignant.

      As far as blogging time, you know that visiting others has always been important to me. Even though I’ve cut back, the fact that I can’t/don’t still bothers me. I guess that’s part of who I am. It is also important to me to keep reader’s informed – therefore one of the reasons I wrote what I did. Meanwhile, we keep smiling!


      1. That we do. And Tina’s message is crystal clear. As you know, I am ripping out my whole upstairs. There will be lots of stuff not making their way back. Ain’t gonna be easy but really. Why? Why keep that which does not give joy? That which does nothing but collect dust!

        I know. That’s why I’ve cut back. I am an avid commenter, as you know. So, I write less and still take time to read but man oh man…
        SMILE AWAY!

        Happy Fourth of July to you and yours!

        Liked by 1 person

  13. You take what time you need Frank. You continue to touch us in ways it’s often difficult to express. You will always be a presence here. It is post like this that I hold in my heart and in my mind. There is so much to think about…

    Liked by 1 person

  14. You touched on this term without using it: ephemera…and sifting through it and finding clues to another’s life. A few years ago, I couldn’t just chuck all my folks’ stuff like my bro wanted to do..I had to touch the stuff and then let it go…or not. I get it.
    ps-post whenever you want/need to – you are the boss, remember! Take care.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Laura,
      Well – I didn’t use “ephemera” because I didn’t know the word until now! 🙂 …. Thanks for the introduction. I’m probably more like you than your brother. When we had to deal with the stuff in my wife’s parent’s home, I let her and her sister make a pass first. But, when I got involved, I kept my eyes open for them. Although I pitched much from my parents, I still went through it …. On the other hand, my sister just can’t part with the stuff. Thanks for sharing … and thanks for the reminder about the boss! 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  15. I was very curious to see where you’d go with this theme and you did well, covering all sorts of holding. “To have and to hold” is a good sort of holding. As with so many words, there can be myriad positive and negative meanings and connotations.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Janet,
      I’m glad you enjoyed this walk. I learned a long time ago an expression that means a lot to me …. look beyond the obvious …. That’s why it takes so long for me to write one of these essays. First it is the collection of thoughts …and that in itself can go over several days. The mind can get other thoughts besides the obvious ones! … and that’s way the number of possible topics here is a long list that keeps growing. 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

    1. Eilene,
      It’s interesting to talk to those who moved a lot during their kid years … especially from my perspective as one who didn’t leave my hometown until college. Some told me they learned not to get too attached – to stay a bit distant – as a protective mechanism because they knew a time would came when they would must let go. Thanks for sharing!

      Liked by 1 person

  16. Interesting thoughts and cogitations, and for me, quite timely. I’ve been suffering back pains of late. Too much gardening? Too much sitting? Or might it have a deeper reason? I believe our bodies are echo chambers of our psyche. The past is behind us, as is my back, and there’s been much pain, back there & when, pain I’ve been holding instead of releasing. So yesterday I made that a conscious thing and released the past. Hey, my back pains have gone. Magic!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Crispina,
      Thanks for sharing something that is very personal to you. No question that our emotions affect how we feel ,,, and that feeling gets us from head to toe. As you mentioned, other factors also come into play – but releasing burdens that we hold onto is both a psychological and physical relief. Good for you – and may those demons that affect your back pain stay away!

      Liked by 2 people

    1. Monika,
      Thanks for the kind words. You have me nodding about acknowledgement – acknowledging to others – acknowledging to self. That seems to be an important aspect of releasing what we hold on to … then again, assuming we are honest with ourselves. After all, don’t we tend to lie to protect ourselves?

      Liked by 1 person

  17. I love these thoughts on the different ways ‘hold’ is present in our lives! There is holding onto something and there is holding onto someone, and both are so very different despite being the same. ❤

    Liked by 1 person

  18. You opened with mentioning how long it took to reply to comments. Here I am, three days after this post went live, finally getting around to reading it. As my inbox gets out of control, I hold onto the posts I want to go back and read (I’m sure you see what I did there 🙂 – Great post, Frank. I hope you find the time you need.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Dan,
      I know the feeling …. You mentioned commenting 3 days after the posting – so here I am five days after you commented! Geez …. so not me. On the other hand, the good news is that it hasn’t driven me crazy … and I know the next post won’t be for several more days. Oh no … that means I have to get it finalized! 😉 Thanks for holding on to my notifications!

      Liked by 1 person

    1. Betsy,
      Thank you for your kind words. Although not true with every walk, sometimes the thought process goes on for several days …. other times in a few hours. This is just taking notes of my thoughts that I will then transform in to a draft. Sometimes thoughts just click – other times I’m not so lucky. Nonetheless, the power of the brain continues to impress me, especially when it takes my thoughts to another level.

      Liked by 1 person

  19. Hi Frank
    I never would have picked this theme as a viable one for a beach walk reflection and yet you nailed it !
    Hold really does have so many angles and this struck a note-
    About those who
    “hold onto the past and resist change over time ”
    Ugh! They can be stuck

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yvette,
      Thanks for the kind words and for sharing the line that struck you the most. I can say that line probably came from my teaching experience. In terms of topics, I continue to be amazed how the human brain is able to deliver deep thoughts. It’s not always smooth, pretty, or quick – but it comes through if we give it a chance. Yes – hold seems like an unlikely topic on the surface, but it obviously isn’t.

      Liked by 1 person

  20. I’m thinking of a song with the lyrics “You gotta hold on me,” but I can’t place it and I don’t want to Google it unless I absolutely have to. Because Google has a hold on me when I am looking for a phrase or a word or a location on the map and I can’t quite place it.

    The Yankees have a hold . . . check that, a stranglehold on first place in their division. Which guarantees nothing, of course, when you consider the Astros still seem to have a hold on their bats when the two teams play. I’ll be holding my breath if they face off in October, no doubt about it.

    A few other holds that came to mind as I read this.

    The 2024 Presidential election is going to be no-holds barred lunacy.

    Hold the mayo! As much as I love it.

    Hold the boat! No . . come to think of it, you can let that boat go.

    Hold on to your hats! We’re at halftime of 2022!

    Or as the operators used to say when you place a collect call . . (Remember those?) Please hold . . .

    Hold on tight if you’re going to be watching fireworks tonight Cincy.

    Happy 4th

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Marc,
      You have my laughing this morning at your collection of holds, which are perfect. After all, I like including idiom on the topic, and for some reason, I don’t believe I did them this time. hmmmm …. We did watch fireworks last night … definitely not at the Reds game, but at a Cincinnati Pops concert (which has become our tradition for the 4th). Hold the mayo is a good idea – well – when I remember to say it. Is this your song? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PKW2S81Cz1w

      Liked by 1 person

      1. The holds have it, Frank.

        Fireworks at a Reds game? It seems highly doubtful, but at least they’re no longer on a historic race to the worst record of all time, so that’s something right?

        The Pops? Very cool.

        It’s a classic, and yes!


  21. I am very glad to have read this beautiful essay, Frank. What an excellent, and I’m not exaggerating, exploration of the word “hold.” I particularly liked the way you brought in the human challenges with holding onto bitterness, anger and resentment. Your walks along the beach are deeply meaningful.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Debra,
      Thank you for the kind words. We go back a long ways in our blogging time, so you comments are extra special. Te beach has a way of relaxing the mind and letting me think then write. This year I returned with 30 drafts. Some are done and published while others are just as I left them. Maybe the beach has a hold on me.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Oh, I think the beach definitely has a hold on you, Frank! 🙂 And we do go back a long time. I was thinking of your music blogs and how much fun they were. There were more bloggers then, too, and the community was a little wider. I think the nice thing now is for a lot of us the blogging is a more reflective time than maybe originally, and we all benefit. Thanks for sharing, as always.


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